Are You the One Making Your Decisions?
Have you ever stopped to ask yourself: Are you truly the one making your decisions? Or are your choices quietly being shaped by habits, undefined values, and external pressures you’ve never consciously examined? Whether we realize it or not, our values—the principles that define what matters most to us—are the hidden compass guiding our decisions, relationships, and sense of purpose. The key is bringing those values to light.
Why Values Matter
Dr. Shalom Schwartz, a renowned researcher, identified 10 universal values shared across cultures. These include benevolence, achievement, security, stimulation, and universalism, among others. While these values resonate with all of us to some degree, how we prioritize them is deeply personal and shapes the lives we lead. Studies consistently show that living in alignment with your values increases well-being, satisfaction, and resilience.
But here’s the challenge: many people go through life without clearly defining their values. Without that clarity, decision-making becomes harder, conflicts feel more overwhelming, and life can feel disjointed. By intentionally uncovering and aligning with your values, you can transform your decisions and your life.
The Power of Values in Action
1. Decision-Making: Values act as a filter, helping you prioritize what matters and filter out distractions. Craig Groeschel calls this the power of “pre-deciding”—aligning your actions with your values before the decision even arises. For example, if you value achievement, skipping a workout might not even occur to you, because fitness is already part of how you live. This clarity reduces decision fatigue and strengthens your commitment to your goals.
2. Emotional Alignment: Living by your values fosters authenticity and triggers a powerful psychological state known as flow—a deep sense of engagement and purpose. If creativity is one of your values, you might lose yourself in painting or writing, experiencing profound fulfillment. Conversely, neglecting your values often leads to restlessness or regret. Research shows that emotional dissonance from misaligned values increases stress and harms mental health.
3. Conflict Resolution: When values serve as your foundation, navigating both internal and external conflicts becomes clearer and more confident. For instance, if security is one of your top values, you might choose to live frugally, declining high-risk investments or expensive outings. In relationships or team settings, shared values can bridge gaps and foster collaboration. The Harvard Negotiation Project highlights how appealing to overarching principles often leads to longer-lasting resolutions.
Reflection Questions
Defining and aligning with your values is transformative. Start by asking yourself:
What moments in my life have felt the most meaningful and why?
What principles do I admire in others that I want to emulate?
Where do I feel the most conflict or dissatisfaction, and what values might be misaligned?
A Surprising Insight: The Cost of Misaligned Values
Did you know that neglecting your core values doesn’t just lead to stress? It can also affect your physical health. Research has found that unresolved internal conflicts, often stemming from value misalignment, can increase the risk of chronic health conditions. Living out of alignment isn’t just emotionally draining—it’s physically taxing too.
Your Values as a Catalyst for Growth
Living with intention starts by identifying and honoring your values. When you align your decisions, emotions, and relationships with what matters most, life becomes more fulfilling, purposeful, and resilient. Values aren’t just a personal compass; they’re a powerful catalyst for growth.
So, what are your values? How are they shaping your life today? Share your thoughts in the comments below or take a moment to write down your top three values and reflect on how they’re guiding you. Start the journey toward living a life of clarity, purpose, and alignment.
